I am also a destructive drinker. I also relate to seeking out coke during the week hours of the morning after drinking all night. The coke actually kept me from cheating on my girlfriend because I can't get an erection after snorting it. Embarrassing at the time but ever so thankful the next day when being interrogated when I stumble in.
It will only get worse. I had to change my whole lifestyle to get sober. Think about your future