You can get there, you are comparing yourself to others-you need to stop doing that if you can. You have your own path. I struggle with this too. It's really hard as its low self esteem (a trait often found in alcoholics I've read-you feel inferior and low and drink to compensate). Remember you are special-you don't need validation-you will get there! Hour by hour is great-people are wired differently. Whatever works is good-just keep sober because you are worth it!