I really agree with FreeOwl on this one--compassion is more powerful than anger
You are doing so well MM, but I remember my spouse was so angry for a long time for same reasons yours is, and I just had to not drink and get through it.
Things are much much better now, and trust has pretty much regrown, but it did take time and me showing day by day that I wasn't going to drink again.
Posting was a really good idea.
Vent and share here, be kind to her there in spite of her anger and resentments.