Hey freeowl - she's gone to bed now so I can sit and watch telly for a few hours, calm down and think how best to tackle the situation. I hope it came across in my last post that I dont blame or judge her for the bitterness she's harbouring, just need to work out a way to move forward. Her main problem is she's scared i'll fail and this argument gave her a bit of power over something she feels totally powerless over....if that makes sense.