Originally Posted by
anattaboy 
MM, I won't rule out AA totally. Back in '10 I would white-knuckle it til 8am and go to a meeting and everything would be good--I made it 16 months. Also had an 8 yr. stint from '89 to '97 in East Tennessee (a big shout-out to Central Group in Johnson City). I've done the steps to the best of my ability 3 times, been GSR, very involved whilst in prison etc.---my problem is "willful forgetfulness". I just really want blotto sometimes and the switch to turn that off is elusive. Actually, it's not an option once I've decided. Today I lean more toward RR and AVRT as it addresses that very thing (the thought process of making it an option again).
As of now I have ate a little and found my vape pen (yay). There are 2 more 12oz beers (geez, these things are tiny) in the fridge and the wife has the car and all the money til 4 . No vodka today (another yay).... I'm getting there....
Sounds to me you know what works. Trouble might be that when you did what worked to NOT DRINK - you maybe didn't do the rest....
See, I found that "not drinking" was just the part of the equation that let me work on the deeper issues that drinking was coping with all along.
"white knuckling" - to me - means we're not dealing with stuff.
Not drinking brings about the opportunity to grow as a person, to offload our baggage, to grow up, to learn about our soul, to find peace with our past and to reinvent who we want to be and free the inner Self we always really were....
But that takes more than just "not drinking".
Maybe you'd find some new ground, some new progress, if you got back into what works for the NOT DRINKING part - and moved into some of the harder work......