Originally Posted by
JaneLane 
Scott, you give such good insight, i see your posts all the time!
I'm scared of upsetting people. That's my big thing. I think that I need to set a boundary and say "okay no more" for a period of time.
Hi, JaneLane. Sending you hugs and support. I totally understand about not wanting to upset people; this is my nemesis too. But as a wise friend explained to me, there is another way to think of this. When we draw a boundary with folks we've let cross our boundaries before (or who have just taken the initiative on their own) it makes sense that they will be upset. It is something new and feels threatening. But in that sense, then, their feelings of upset and discomfort might be read not as something to respond to and correct, but rather as a sign that we are taking good care of ourselves by drawing boundaries. It is truly impossible to take care of ourselves and make everyone happy, at least in my experience. This little mental shift helps me deal with my people pleasing tendencies and boundary-crossing family.
Take care.