So sorry about your mother. She sounds exactly like mine! She showed up at one of my kid's sporting events tonite and I immediately excused myself to go to the restroom. I didn't actually go to the restroom, I went to my car and drove home. I called my sponsor and she said I did the right thing by leaving the event and avoiding her. She is toxic for me right now and I need to be careful because I am in early sobriety.
Don't be afraid to take care of yourself. My mother is a sick woman. I can't be around her right now and I am to the point where I am putting MYSELF first PERIOD.
I hope you can find the strength to put yourself first too.
(((Hug)))