secretary, we're living parallel lives! right down to the husband's sleep apnea and separate beds. and me too about the anxiety. it has really dissipated. what a relief. I'm still gobsmacked with the realization that it was the booze/morning withdrawal which was causing the chronic state of it! I haven't had that morning wine in months now. really starting to see my alcoholism for what it was -- and how much it was affecting my day to day life, in unexpected ways. hooray for small things! which do become big things over time...