Don't forget the burden of addiction Opio, I'm clean 5 months now and look back in dread to how unmanageable and chaotic life was an Heroin addict, I'm sure you don't but I think we all have to face that one - life without drugs and the fact it isn't going to be a carnival atmosphere everyday, when I just a drunk in my 20s and fully fledged E head & coke fiend Thursday till Sunday if I ever gave up the drink, parachuted down, got on the Valium to help sleep etc I'd stay sober till the first day I woke up not feeling great, I'd be all indignant - I give up booze and feel like THIS? That was me back on the drink again. Hardest thing I find is facing up to life is still a massive pain in the arse/stress/head wrecker when you're straight - just like we romanticise our addiction at times when in the depths of a cycle on insanity using we romanticise being clean. You a strong guy, love ur kids, Cleary v smart but you seem to be projecting ahead too much, if it Carries on like this etc etc - I appreciate you are under serious pressure at the moment but there no need to live beyond the moment re your addiction. Obviously other events have long term implications but I think it important you try and keep managing your addiction and the domestic front as seperate as possible. Sorry if I sound crass or patronising id never disrespect you mate - got massive respect for what uve done. Stay strong. U only have to stay clean now. A years time or whatever is a year away. Face it then. Keep the faith bro