Little kids have no idea and yours sound quite small. A good friend of mine has five kids who range from teens to pre- schoolers and she insists that her kids do something for her for Mothers Day and her birthday. She reminds them how much she does for them and that she expects them to make an effort for her on those days. I personally think it's brilliant. Congrats on your sober time by the way and sorry you are hurting (( hugs))