Originally Posted by Zebra1275

Any similar experiences? - Yep.

How to break the cycle? (again) - Stop thinking that you can do this by yourself.

Here is what I finally figured out, after years of denial.

A) I came to the realization that I was a drunk.

B) I realized, that as a drunk, I was trying to give myself advice on how to get and stay sober.

C) I concluded that was pretty stupid and finally went to AA.