Hi Robinz, I feel for you and I'm glad you didn't drink. Drinking would only make things worse. My son is adhd and 9. My daughter is six and sometimes has screaming fits. What I have noticed is that their behavior has substantially improved since I stopped drinking and started being consistently present in their lives.
I don't know your situation but when I was drinking my focus was on drinking. All my interactions with my children were with half a mind and rushed through so that I could get to my drinking. So they acted up for attention because I wasn't giving it to them.
Hang in there. Maybe take your daughter to her pediatrician for an evaluation and possibly therapy. She's not too young to go to "the talking doctor." Actually, my niece was much the same way. She did go for therapy and she is doing great now.