Therapy (specifically EMDR for post-traumatic/blocked abuse memories), journaling & working the 12 Steps helped me. I'm not an AA proponent necessarily, but I truly believe everyone should/needs to work them at some point in their lives. I didn't work them as an alcoholic, rather, as a co-dependent. They're hard & hurtful as hell but necessary for me to move thru the pain of my past. Working them is one of my most proud accomplishments in life.
The one universal thing you MUST do without question is keep talking & reaching out for help/feedback. It's a HUGE first step & I commend you for it.