Thread: Finally Done
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Old 05-04-2015, 02:44 PM
  # 13 (permalink)  
FreeOwl
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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"Don’t know what possesses me to want to wreck an enjoyable time with family by draining ½ a bottle of Vodka but I’ve been doing that for a while. "

Yeah.... I did this too. Just like you; in secret. Mostly hidden from the awareness of those in my life close to me and definitely from those not in my immediate family.

Why? What possessed me? Well, in part an inner grief. In part living a life carrying around emotional baggage I wasn't dealing with. In part just the stress of day-to-day living.... but at the end of the day, those were all just the contributing factors that were accelerating the base issue; Alcohol as an Escape. Addiction as a long-time coping strategy.

It took me a couple years of actually facing up to it to finally come to terms with accepting that sobriety was a better choice for me. Now, over a year on, I am living that truth. Sober is SO much better.

It can be tough in your shoes. I was in them too.... lots of things support your addictive belief that 'it's not that bad'. You still have a job, a family, a supportive community..... but don't fall victim to 'it's not that bad'. Listen to your Soul's own wisdom. That's what's telling you 'it's not that bad' is NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

We have a precious limited time on this physical liferide.... it sounds to me like you're ready to wake up and make the joyous, wonderful, blessed, cherished MOST of it.

Good for you!! Embrace that voice! Let it guide you! Ask it to show you just how GREAT it can be. Avoiding it getting worse is a good motivation - but I have found that discovering how incredibly great it can be is the motivation that has kept me on the path.

Welcome.
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