Oh, Frank, you're drinking is so familiar!!! I didn't have the same amount, but I would drink in the same pattern. So drunk one day that I was basically still drunk the following morning.... I'd call it the 'hair of the dog', but I wasn't chasing off a hangover, I was trying to maintain my drunkenness. Continue for the rest of the day, make a run, blackout, carry on the next day. By the fourth day, my body would start to reject it and I would take a swig and throw it up, but I'd keep trying until I could keep it down, otherwise, heaven forbid, I might sober up. By the fifth day, I'd be too sick to drink or eat and, under duress, would finally give my body a break. Then the walk of shame through the house, looking at the disaster it had turned into. The pathetic attempt at taking a shower. The inability to put on my makeup because my hands were shaking too much. Feeling accomplished because I was able to at least load the dishwasher without breaking a dish.
It can be behind us now, Frank. I hope you are doing well. I can see your potential! And I can also see how you beat yourself up and make yourself believe that you are not worth it. But you're worth it to me. You made me laugh last week on my absolute worst day. And if you can do that for a stranger, imagine the lengths that you'll be able to go to for those that know you. Lots of good thoughts today, Frank. Hope all is well!