Thanks for all the advice. I understand that the move will be difficult for her to adjust to and will inevitably bring stress. I was going to have to move anyway but staying around here wasn't going to address any of the stuff that has contributed to this problem. This whole nightmare situation has highlighted all the things that weren't right with our relationship and all the stuff in our lives that were making us both unhappy. Isolation, lack of support, job dissatisfaction and of coarse alcohol abuse. I hope the move will address at least some of these though not kidding myself on that everything will all be rosey. My thinking has changed dramatically recently. It may sound crazy but I'm actually glad that this happened in a way. Obviously horrible that my partner ended up in rehab an me and my son have been left to pick up the pieces but glad we've identified both our shortcomings and can address them - look to change and be better parents and partners to each other , glad it happened at a point in my sons life that he wouldn't even remember, glad nothing happened that can't be fixed i.e injury through DUI, glad to be moving on as we have been considering for a while, glad my partner finally accepts her powerlessness over alcohol and looking forward to a sober relationship with her. I'm probably coming across very naive, I know the relapse stats aren't in her favour but have to be positive at this point. She's had such a scare, almost lost everything that she cares about and I hope by addressing some of the stuff that was making us both unhappy that will support her recovery. Her son will be her main motivation I think, she misses him terribly and him her. With change, support and honesty I hope we can make it through. She has always had a problem with honesty, not that she's a liar it's just she very good at bottling stuff up, pulling the wool over peoples eyes, making out all's ok. She's doing a lot of work on that in the clinic and I hope our relationship will benefit from that. Plan on going to al anon meeting once moved and AA will also be available for her. I don't really drink so there will be no booze in the house but there is a pub down the road but then where isn't there easy access to the stuff. We have agreed to leave guilt and shame behind us as best we can anyway and I have forgiven her for the most part. With this recent change in thinking my anger has fallen away. Pretty remarkable really. I just don't want guilt to hold back her recovery as that's the main feeling she has been holding on to. she had a death in the family this week which hasn't helped. Terrible timing but has been expected (long term illness). She is dealing with it as well as can be expected.