Congrats on reaching 21 days zab.
A couple things you mentioned. Am I an addict? For me that is a two part answer. The day I quit drinking for good was they I was no longer an addict. The day I pick up my next drink I become an addict again.
Which brings me to the second point. You ask if you will ever be able to drink 'normally' again. For me and many others others, the answer is, "I don't really want to risk knowing the answer to that. So it is no."
Keep up the good work. Also glad to hear you are getting on with your other half.