What worked for me? My children won't talk to me and my family won't let me in their homes. I found my bottom. I'm looking at losing my freedom too.
I was only willing to change when I didn't like what happened when I used.
I couldn't quit until I was ready. That was my experience and what I've seen from most of the people here on SR. There are some who had a higher bottom than I did. I am so glad for them.
Anyway.
I pray you find your way.