I listened to an AA speaker once tell a story about spending time answering the central office AA hotline. A woman called and asked how far down the waiting list her husband was as he'd called over three weeks ago?!
Ummmm, waiting list? Yes - my husband said there was a waiting list for meetings.
There's is a tendency for alcoholics to be highly manipulative and not always forthcoming with the truth.
Take care of yourself, please. Therapy and Alanon are good ideas !
Glad you're here and posting.