Originally Posted by
paintballguy 
On the "god" thing i am a humanist druid. Part of how i got pissed at my friend is with my beleif system you cant surrender to it, it just isnt congruent. Its an energy thing, love the forest and nature and be attuned to it and it will give you the energy you need.
Okay I am just going to throw this out there and I am by no means telling you what to do or how to do it. I am not religious either.
Is there anything from the big book or the program that you did like or agree with? All it has to be is one thing. I focused on what I understood and agreed with. Can the energy not be your higher power in a sense? I go to AA meeting just cause I want to be around others. That is basically why I go. I focus on what I like about AA.
Also during early recover I was asked to do lots of things I didn't want to. So I starting asking myself "would I have done this if i had to do it in order to drink" . The answer was yes, yes i sure would have. I wouldn't have cared what was said at any meeting I would had to go in order to get my booze.
This is just something I did for me though, I am not being pushy, just offering what I did in the early stages that kind of helped me deal with it. Instead of focusing on what I didn't like I focused on what I did like.
As others have said there are lots of programs out there I actually focus on 3 of them
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