Firstly, I'd like to say I'm sorry for your situation. What you are experiencing isn't easy. When we are dealing with difficult things in life we want our loved ones to be there for us. You don't have that luxury. You have the reminder of what you are trying to achieve and why with the allure of alcohol in addition to it. I totally understand. My Mother "sets" me off. I don't like being around here when she is drinking which is at every social or family gathering we have. You have received terrific advice. I cannot offer anything other than what was already said. You must come first. Establish a strong sober foundation before trying to socialize with your family. It is hard, but sounds crucial given your situation. My best to you...