WARNING - Alcoholic Abuse!
Start the process of ending it NOW...or it will continue to run out-of-control.
There are NO 'Triggers'.... that from me, a recovered Alcoholic. 'I' was my 'Trigger' ... my never-ending self-serving demand for self-pleasure was my 'Trigger', NOT any specific condition or event or anything else... and all the 'Alcoholics' in my circle of recovered friends believe the same thing.
Honesty is a product of REAL recovery...it is NOT a capability of an Alcoholic running on Self-Will-Run-Riot.
This is a very different type post from my norm, I typically avoid speaking of anything except relating from my own experience and my own actions and history, however I do NOT want to see you continue down this path, and your kids, because you DON'T recognize the REALITY of the Behavioral Nature of an active Alcoholic hell-bent on getting their self-pleasure, and from reading your post it is evident you are being completely deceived and your 'hopefulness' is true enabling.
Cut her off, and demand immediate rehab, and/or start the process of ENDING the Alcoholic Abuse you are currently being subjected to.