Being a binge drinking drunk lush; has helped I must admit. My problem has become my anxiety now. The pain is something I am sadly getting use to. I've had to push my body just to help my folks; but that feeling needed has helped. I wipe my tears in the morning & do what I gotta do.
It could be the alcoholic in me informing me that a couple beers will help w\ the panic attacks; & it does. But I know 2-3 beers leads to 2-3 day or more binge. Being in Baltihell; knowing the people I know I have access to almost any chemical under the sun; yet I chose not to go that route.
It's getting rather frustrating though knowing less than a 5minute walk I can buy heroin. But can't get an f'in doctor to see me or prescribe anything all b\c I have no insurance here. It has truly started to drive me insane ..
Just more rambling on my part I guess ..
Dennis
Sent from my Nexus 7 using Sober Recovery