Well, we are all different in both our psychological makeup and physical strengths and weaknesses. I think have hypertension. My other withdrawal symptoms were rather mild and I recovered quickly. That being said I still could have died with the through the roof blood pressure. That thought is very strong right now. My grown kids were sincerely worried about me. I have a first grandchild halfway across the country that I will see for the first time in about 10 days. If I die now who is going to make those fantastic halloween costumes and send all the neat toys I have saved, and send the best chocolate chip cookies in the world (so my kids said)?
My divorce about 7 years ago really took me down and I really didn't care what I did to myself. Death by a thousand cuts (well, beers).
Yes, I need huge changes, right now I am looking into a psychiatrist. I have more than one serious unresloved issue from the past. Horrible things happened that are so hard to deal with even now. I just put on the successful happy face and did what ever I wanted when alone. Closeted drinker, ya think?