Milestone
Today is Day 100 for me.
I won't lie. This has not been easy. I've been through Hell, and it's not over, but every day is better.
Nights are times of temptation, but in the morning I always feel strong. That lying ******* Addict Voice whispers in my ear, and it can be persuasive. Every morning I am thankful for my strength.
I have taken a few breaks here and there, but most I have steadily drank--gotten drunk--every night for over three decades. That brings on a monster of a dependency problem.
I'm mostly doing it alone. I've heard some say that is impossible, but I say that anything is possibly if you put your mind to it, and your resolve is strong enough.
I am keeping very busy. Reading, writing, exercise, working, home projects.
I am seeing someone. I know that many advise against that, but what can you do? I met a woman, and I like her. She likes me. I have been totally honest. She does not drink, and has never been a problem drinker.
She wants to move faster, but I am going very slowly. I am still discovering who I am without the omnipresent influence of alcohol in my system. You know what? I like it. A lot. And it is going to get better.
Having someone to take walks with, who will listen to me (as I listen to her); dinners, movies. That kind of contentment can make a world of difference.
There is no way I am turning back now. I am stronger by the day, and I am seeing more clearly. I have the best job I have ever had in my life, and I don't mean to mess it up.
Thanks to everyone, and God bless you all. It's a great day to be alive and sober.