Amen to that. That sounds exactly like me. I guess "I" am the trigger. Just like you said when things are good, time to have a drink, when things are bad, drink to cope. AND constantly planning how i can drink each night. Man I want to be free of this so bad. I can see how good it is on the other side, just need to commit. Sort of feel stupid having to come back to this site again with my tail between my legs. So it goes...thank you all so much for the input!