Hi dj, I've been following this thread and my observation is that your life is well, chaotic. There are some drinking and drug issues, kids involved, and your wife sounds like she can be just plain mean. I'm certainly not going to tell you what to do, but I do believe you have some serious decisions to make, and quickly. It sounds as if thins are unraveling and could completely fall apart at any moment. Others will be able to offer better advice than myself, but I would prioritize the various issues you are facing and try and tackle then one at a time. And do is sober. I wish you the very best dj.