Welcome to SR, DJ. You'll find lots of support, wise people and good counsel. Some musicians here, too, who are rockin' the sober life.
The bottom line: You can live a sober healthy life.
Lots of references to partying and your life as a partier. Toward the end of your first post, you made reference to having children -- and later that your spouse, who is an alcoholic, wants to try for another baby.
If you need some inspiration for your sobriety, look into the eyes of your children. I can assure you, the decisions about alcohol and drugs being made in your home are impacting them already. Take some time to check out the "Adult Children" and "Friends and Family" sections of SR. There are plenty of heart-breaking stories about what alcoholism and addiction does to kids.
You can right the ship so that your kids have better chances. Your children deserve your sobriety -- and their mothers -- every bit as much as you do.