Hi all,
My girlfriend has just entered a detox/rehabilitation clinic for a period of 6-21 weeks depending on how she responds to treatment for her alcoholism. I've been left with the care of our 3 year old son and we are about to be kick out of our home as a consequence of her drinking at work and losing her job (our flat came with her job). I got so much stuff to sort out and any advice would be welcome. It's been a nightmare year for us all. My girlfriend has always had an unhealthy relationship alcohol, once she started to drink she just didn't stop till she dropped. I was always embarrassed and upset by it so distanced myself from it by not really going out with her when I knew drink was available (we ended up not having much of a social life ) She started drinking daily at home after the birth of our lovely son and about 6 months ago I put my foot down and stopped it. Unfortunately it turns out she had already become dependant by that point as she started drinking everywhere else i.e work, began sneaking about, stashing and lots and lots of lying. She has also spent the last 6 months blaming her drinking on our relationship, the stress of bring up our son and our life and work. Classic behaviour as I understand it. Anyway, she was acceptant of the opportunity to go into rehab to her credit but that's left me in a mighty hole regarding what steps I should take next. As I mentioned we got to find somewhere else to live soon and with the child care I can only work part time and can't really afford anywhere near the clinic so we could visit her once a week for the next few months. Also worried that after a very stressful and tiring 6 months , another 6 months of worry and little support along with financial burdens what state I will be in for my son in a few months. Most of my family live a long way away and have offered to put us up but then we couldn't visit the clinic very often. Not sure what is left of our relationship at this point, kind of depends what she's saying when she's sober and being honest with herself but don't want to make a decision that may damage her recovery ie no visits from her son. I know I have to focus on my well being at this point and my sons and understand that she has to focus on herself in rehab so maybe I would be better off moving away to my support network at this point and let her join us when she's out of the clinic. If I stay around here I'm worried I may cripple myself emotionally, physically and financially for the sake of a few hours visits over the next few months ?? If we do work things out then what home environment would she be returning to after the clinic ?? I've got a lot of resentment to deal with over this and don't want to make a decision that may actually fuel that even more. Got about a month to decide whether to move into a rental property near the clinic or head 500 miles away to be with my family. Tough one hey. Any opinions and advice most welcome
