Originally Posted by Beccybean

1. 41 (after drinking in a problematic way since about 15 - not all the time, but once I started drinking you could bet I'd be blackout or at least legless drunk before I'd stop). Yeah that pretty much sums me up

2. I started off on my own, and almost lost my sanity mistakenly thinking that just 'not drinking' would be enough. Finally I realised that alcoholism IS a kind of insanity I'm starting to believe that, and I needed contact with others who understood me and that, so I got myself to AA, going to a variety of meetings 'til I found the ones where I felt most comfortable. I listened for similarities to learn from and overlooked the differences Nice point, I'll remember between myself and others in the fellowship. I read and listened LOTS. Gradually I started taking more of an active part. Helping with chairs; washing up; etc.; sharing my thoughts; and learning to accept help. I also has some counselling which my boss referred me for when the dry-drunk-depression hit me big time and she got proper worried about me (unlike my Doctor who said I'd just get over it) I need this too, you have a good boss.

3. I'm continuing with meetings at AA and coming on here. Reading lots. Working through the 12-steps and learning to take responsibility for myself and LIVE sober I hear that (not just be a dry drunk), and learning to understand my fears and anxieties; my resentments; my character defects and strengths; and coming to terms with my past so that I am ready to live my future. In social situations I have become very selfish. My sobriety comes before anything or anyone else. This is what I need to adopt: an almost siege mentality to my own sobriety...which I've not done and social situations have screwed me over (my reaction to them) If people don't understand that then that's kind of tough, as it's non-negotiable. I do go out, but on my terms, and often will escape, Cinderella like, into the night to get away from alcohol and drunk people who are starting to get on my nerves (karma hey!!) but a lot earlier than midnight unless there's a good band playing.