I get what you're getting at Dave. Still, the alcohol isn't going to work forever to numb yourself. What are you going to do then? What are you going to do when you start having health problems due to it? What are you going to do when you start having to drink not to get drunk, but to ward off withdrawal?
You're going to be going what you were going through to get sober, but it will be even worse if you keep going.