View Single Post
Old 03-17-2015, 12:25 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
ipaidwithmylife
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Berlaar Antwerpen
Posts: 72
Angry Fine for a while, then: BOOM: mind-melt!

Hi: so I apologize in advance for the endless rant, but...

here's the thing: my messed-up brain terribly puzzles me: up to a few weeks ago, when I'd just quit, it seemed like I was sorta heading in the right direction: I had brain fog during the day, but I still experienced active thoughts at night, dreamt, remembered everything about my day... I was hopeful and didn't really mind the set-back that much...

Since the beginning of this week, though: I feel like it's all going backwards: I say the dumbest things, put things in the wrong place... Is this normal? And can I expect progress again? I binge-drank(bottle of wine or five cans of beer two times a week, for about a year and four months, so I'm kind of counting the same amount of time for my recovery.) I stopped drinking a little before New-years...

To be honest: sobriety hasn't been such a positive experience, up til this point(as you can already tell from multiple posts of mine.) I keep waiting for some miracle to happen. I'm not religious by any means, but I pray everyday. I only want me back. I miss me a lot. This right now: is NOT me! I don't know who the hell this person is, but... ugh I just... I feel lost and it never, for one minute stops.

Any tips to feel better or words of consolation? It'll be much appreciated...
ipaidwithmylife is offline