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Old 05-13-2005, 07:18 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
findinganewme
old enough to know BETTER!!!!!
 
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 396
Def?????

Who's the ADULT here!? Sounds to me like it's you, honey!

I cannot stop crying from your kind words. You're encouraging me .... when you are battling with your own.

I THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!

WOW! I cannot thank you enough for your response.

Sadly, I cannot continue to write as I cannot see the screen through my tears! I will write more later.

For now, know that you have touched me deeply and I appreciate it so very much!

This was certainly NOT a garbled message ..... it was a very truthful, heartfelt message. Garble, ramble to me all you want. Will you ADOPT me? Seems as though you have so much more strength, great spirit, forgiveness, awareness, and an amazing inner beauty ..... than I do!

Hugs and kisses to you sweetie!
Maria
PS: I may just print your response and have my girls read it .... however, they're in denial and don't much care to talk about MOM's problem. Can't say I blame them

All my love to YOU!


Originally Posted by DefofLov
Oh Maria,

We do what we can with what we have you know? You have made mistakes in the past and now you are doing what you can and all you can do is keep doing your best to make it right. You daughters may have to go through a recovery process too.

Family relationships are not easy, alcohol/addiction or not. Everyone in the family has to work to become a nurturing and supportive entity.

My mother is still an alcoholic, we dont have a "real" relationship. I appreciate what we do have even if it isn't much. I appreciate the fact that I can call her and hear her voice even if she doesn't quite know me. I appreciate the fact that she is alive. No matter how cynical I am about it, if she is still breathing there is still a chance.

I appreciate the person I have become as a result of the lifestyle she chose. I am stronger for it and I choose not to go down the same path.

I see a cycle in my family and I am determined to stop it and determined to raise healthy children who do not suffer the same as I do. This means I continue to recover and I continue to work hard on myself. It is not to late for me and it is not too late for you or your daughters.

They have to come forward, they have to forgive, they have to recover on their own. It will take time for them to realize this and work on both of your parts to rectify the relationship you have with one another and move to a more positive and fulfilling level.

Having the Mom I have had has taught me many lessons:

1. People have to change/recover on their own.

2. You truly cannot take care of others if you are not taking care of yourself.

3. Take nothing in life for granted.

4. If you set your heart on something and put your energy into it, even if you do not reach what you are aiming for, you gain something special in the process.

5. My life is under my control and it is my choice to either love it, hate it, or feel indifferent. I choose to love it.

I know that was a garbled message but I hope in all that you know that I appreciated your response and I really hope that you do not continue to beat yourself up over your past. Take responsibility yes, but dont stop yourself into the ground. You are doing way more than I can say for my mother.

*hug*

~Def
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