Kiro- I see this post was from a couple months ago but I thought I'd post anyway! I can totally understand what you're talking about and I'll even go one step further. I forgot who I used to be before using and how I used to respond to every day things... I remember, for what seemed like an eternity, I didn't like to go in stores alone because I found myself feeling like I didn't know (get ready for this!) what to do with my ARMS!! I felt like if I would swing them, I'd look odd, folded them, I'd look defensive...I could go on and on. HAHA! I'm happy to report that I just kept "faking it till I felt it" happy, that is. I also remember saying "I dont understand happiness and don't see anything happy or exciting now" ~ I still have struggles with socialization. I isolate myself from time to time due to feeling so awkward when I try to carry on a normal conversation. I even struggled for a while with talking on the phone. Most of these things have really subsided and others, I have worked through to create the new me. The course in Miracles has helped me greatly and of course counseling. I cant stress enough that you need to find the counselor thats the perfect fit for you. If you have the slightest bit of reservations or doubt with him/her then find a new one.