Originally Posted by
Flowers94 
Need Advice
Hello, well Ive been dating this narcotics addict for 3 months now.
When we just started I didn't know he had a drug problem until our second month together. I've been really understanding and supportive of him when it comes to going to meetings and staying sober. I know there's not much I can do because being sober is all up to him, but I'm always there for him when he needs someone to talk to or when he's having a rough day and craving drugs.
This past week has been very hard on me, whenever he has a bad day craving drugs the mood he's in really does affect the time we spend with each other. He can get real quiet or stress out and I'm just sitting worthless because I can't do much. I know he loves me and I love him and I know I can't be first because getting sober comes first but it just hurts so much sometimes. It hurts when we can't hang out as much because of meetings and then I feel like he doesn't love me but its just that I worry that he will get over me and meet someone in a meeting. I know it's silly of me to think that way but that's how it is. I just really love him and his mom has been very grateful having me around to help him out specially because she's a recovered addict as well. I still want to be with him but it's so hard and it hurts when I worry so much. Can anyone give me advice please.
Hi Flowers,
Was he in recovery and attending meetings when you met? Curious how long hes been going? Maybe it would help if you think of his recovery work as just "work". Its going to take some of his time, create varying moods. My husband went through treatment over a year ago now, he never did meetings so I cant speak to that exactly, but I can say the first few months were emotional and when he was in rehab I had a lot of adjustments to make with him not around. Try not to worry about his meeting someone while attending, realistically he could meet someone other places if hes looking right? So it comes down to a trust issue I think. I would also share with his mom about your feelings, she might have some good feedback having been in a similar situation. Now might be a good time to fill in the time gaps with other friends, or activities you enjoy.