GabrielleSolis1:
I've read all your posts and am sorry you are having such a rough time. I have sent you a private message and hope you read it. Perhaps it may help. It does not judge you or lecture to you. Just suggests some things which may interest you. I want you to know that I have been where you are right now. I know what it's like. I'm here for you. Send me a private message if you want to. If not, then may I wish you all the luck in the world. every good wish.
W.