This site is amazing, Gabrielle. This an abundance of information here on alcoholism, recovery techniques, etc. The best part is the people - a really great group of supportive and encouraging members.
I, too, hated realizing, acknowledging and accepting that I was an alcoholic but I had reached the point that denying it was worse - I was broken, destroyed and soulless. sobriety has turned that around; I can't begin to say how content and happy I am in my 'alcoholic in recovery' skin.
We are here for you 24/7/365, Gabrielle.