Originally Posted by
Rosalba 
If he's so keen for your son to be told, why isn't he doing it himself? Sounds like the kind of game-playing where you get all the responsibility and he retains all the power by passive aggression and being obstructive.
By the way, even if you do talk openly it's probably a good idea to email to confirm what's been said - as it gives you a contemporary, dated and timed record, in writing.
We are talking to our son together.
I decided that it's OK to tell our son because I need something to give me a kick in the pants to get the ball rolling. I have a meeting with my lawyer on the 22nd but I can probably push that up and pay her the retainer fee early.
I'm not going to let him bully me. He wants us all to live in this house until things are final and the house sells, but that's not happening. As soon as we tell our son, that's the catalyst for me to start looking for a rental home (actually I've earmarked a few places already that I want my realtor to show me).
It's funny because his wording in the emails goes like this, "I just planned on following your lead. All I wanted to do for now is tell him we're splitting up. I'll agree with whatever you want to tell him......"
Then, in another email he said, "I understand your apprehension, however, I don't see how waiting changes anything. We sort of have a chicken egg thing going on where you don't want to say anything to him and we are not speaking to each other because we haven't said anything to him...."
Honestly, I got the impression that he just wants to be able to talk about all of this in front of our son. He wants to approach me at the dinner table and say, "Well, who's keeping this table we're eating on because I don't want it(or whatever..)"
So, my last email yesterday told him that I still WILL NOT talk to him about the divorce or the finances or who gets what, in front of our son. Not negotiating on this one because he's still a child and doesn't need to be subjected to any of our crap. Just because it's out in the open doesn't mean we have to start 'talking' about it in the open. UGH!