Ugh.. Stay strong.
That feeling is THE WORST.
When I finally made my AH move out last September, the pain was too much for me to take at the time... and I ended up giving in and letting him come back. Things are better and he's not drinking now, but still, I know I made the wrong decision by letting him come back as soon as I did. Now I'm just waiting for the bomb to drop...
You made the right decision!! It will be hard for a while, but it WILL get better.
STAY STRONG
HUGS