Todzilla....the thought that I had, reading your post: "When one partner makes significant changes in a relationship--the other partner will respond in SOME way. It is like a dance, in many ways.
I don't know enough about you all to say "dry drunk" or not. I also don't know how well manged her bi-polar condition is managed. It can present as irritability and restlessness, etc. But, I can't address that either.
If this has been going on for a year, I would suggest enlisting the help of a professional--at least, a few appointments to talk it over, yourself.....to get some perspective. I imagine the atmosphere in your home is a bit miserable?
LOl!..Menopause can be a B**** for some people--but we can't blame your list on that!
It all sounds pretty complex, to me. I would get some outside help before waiting very much longer.
dandylion
By the way: I want to welcome you to the board!!!
Please hang around---you will get a lot m ore feedback once the holiday has passed, I am sure.