zoso77

Just spoke with my brother down south about an hour ago as I was packing.

He told me my niece admitted herself to rehab for alcoholism.

It's not too often I'm stunned into silence these days, but this evening was one of those moments. I still vividly remember the day she was born. Her mother is small, and my niece was born a little bit premature. She was so small, she fit in my hand. Absolutely tiny. We were incredibly close during the first years of her life. In a way, we still are, even though we don't see each other that often anymore.

I must admit I'm rather pissed off at God right now. Irrationally so, but pissed just the same. I got off the phone with my brother, looked up at my ceiling, and said aloud:

Really? Her? Are you f*cking kidding me?

I then threw my baseball hat on the floor in anger.

But no matter who it is that goes into rehab, that person is someone's child. Someone's parent. Someone's spouse, or sibling, or friend...or niece. And after I sat down and thought about it some, it occurred to me that if my niece wants to seek recovery, she's going to have to assume responsibility for herself every day for the rest of her life. She doesn't fit in my hand anymore. She's an adult, and adults need to learn how to stand on their own.

My brother doesn't know that I know what I know about addiction and/or alcoholism. He doesn't know that my last girlfriend was a drug addict. He doesn't know I was in Al Anon, or have gone to NA and AA meetings in the past. He certainly doesn't know his brother is ZoSo77. For now, I'm going to keep it that way.

F*ck. F*ck f*ck f*ck f*ck f*ck!!!!!