Do you have a sponsor in al-anon?
I know that you have talked about two things within recent memory: shopaholic stuff and money issues and you just bought a new car. People who have shopaholic tendencies tend to buy things in order to distract themselves from their feelings. I'm speaking from my own personal experiences. Last Christmas, I treated myself to two Louis Vuitton bags and a pair of Chanel sunglasses. They gave me a momentary "I deserve this stuff" high but all of my problems brought me back down because I still didn't deal with them.
I hope this doesn't come off as insensitive, I'm attempting to bring in a different perspective.
Today I took myself to my doctor for a long overdue checkup. Next week it's the dentist. This is what I've learned that self care it is about: less about money, more about self.