It's painful to read of your ongoing struggles.
Originally Posted by
Mrrryah1 
What do you guys think about this? Is it possible that I'm lacking balance and that's why I keep relapsing despite doing meetings/steps/sponsor/etc??
It would be great if the key to unlocking your struggles with sobriety was as simple as finding balance in life. And maybe it is. But I think that balance is the result of a strong recovery...not the foundation of recovery.
I've looked back at some of your relapse threads. I can find nothing that would point to a problem with balance. I agree that you should find sober friends and activities, new hobbies, sober ways to enjoy life. I've found these to be the
gifts of sobriety, not the way to achieve it.
Your addiction is powerful, and the reasons you fail are complex. Start looking at your recovery program, and where it's failing, or where you are failing to implement it.