George89

Hi guys, hope you are all well and having a lovely sunday first of all.

I have been struggling with alcohol for a few years and am aged 25. Although I have been 'struggling' with it for a few years, I think it is only over the past few months that I have realised that I have a problem, and secondly that the habit as moved past just a habit and is becoming, if not already become, a real addiction.

I did stop drinking for a month in mid september to mid october, and now, in early december, I feel like I am back in that dark place again. I have been more or less drinking or trying to drink 'moderately' and to others, I don't think too many people can see I have a problem. I hide my hangovers at work, I drink on 'special occasions' but then just how many special occasions have I had to drink over the last few weeks? I am fooling myself.

I went to a nightclub on Friday evening, getting back in the early hours of saturday morning, and after being hungover all day saturday and still not feeling amazing today, I just realise that I can't do this anymore. This can't be my life anymore. I know I can't handle the alcohol, I can't drink and be happy. And I can't feel good about myself when I make myself hungover.

Then, there is this voice in my head more recently that thinks 'when can I have my next drink?' 'will this be the last drink for the week?' and I know, when these kind of thoughts arise, that it is certainly indicative of something more serious.

I think I need to go to AA meetings before this gets any worse..I guess perhaps it is a sense of denial, but I think 'I am only 25, I can't be an alcoholic or be an addict to drink, its just not possible', but when I am honest with myself I know I have a problem in some shape and form..

thanks for reading guys, needed to get this of my plate.