lucybb

I watched the addiction cartoon posted by Hammer, and I was alarmed at how many of the traits of addicts are shown by my 7 year old DS. Easily frustrated, feels misunderstood, very sensitive, etc.

In our house, the drinking is a non-topic - it is not mentioned. I have confronted my AH about the drinking only a few times over the last 2 years, and the last time, in August, when I laid out for him the damage done over the last 6 years and said we'll have to talk to DS about it at some point, he said 'just don't say anything to DS about it, that would kill me'. So, his feelings are more important (as usual - selfish, selfish, selfish) than our DS's future safety and current emotional well being.

I have seen a few posts here about folks bringing it out into the open with their kids, so it is not the elephant in the room and they understand what is happening, but it seems it is mainly with older kids. I am concerned that if he has the prediliction to be an addict one day, the sooner he knows about his family history and how important it is that he avoids drugs, booze, cigarettes, etc, the better. Plus, I'm tired of making excuses for AH when he says something crappy to DS - 'daddy's in a bad mood...etc.' AH is finally being a parent to DS lately (aside from the driving drunk a few weeks ago that is) - I'm worried that DS will think that daddy being nice to him now must be something he did, and when daddy is not being nice to him, maybe it's because of something he did.

How do you decide when to bring this up, even against the A's wishes? Is it way too early to worry about this?