Hi & welcome.
Lexie said everything I could have said, and then some.
I married an alcoholic and had children with him. Stayed with him 20 years. While I love my children and wouldn't trade them for the world, the downhill spiral AXH went through, and the abuse the kids and I suffered as a direct consequence of his drinking were horrible. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
Like Lexie said, I loved his potential. I loved the person he could be if he quit drinking. The thing was -- he never did. It was like being married to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and never knowing when the monster would pop out. As the years went by, there was less and less Jekyll and more and more Hyde.
All our kids are in at least weekly therapy because of what they went through. I can't afford therapy for myself in addition to what I'm paying for their therapy. The scars that marriage left me with will be there for life.
I don't believe we have one soulmate that we're "supposed" to be with. I believe that we make choices, and when we choose to be with someone when we don't love them but their potential, we choose unwisely.