Yep, FreeOwl I think you nailed it with this statement:
"For me, I am quite sure that it is emotional and psychological and that I'm essentially having to process long-held pain, shame, fear, self-esteem issues, anxiety that had for so many years just been 'medicated'"
So much raw emotion. Guilt is killing me. I pushed away a lot of people in my life by my drinking. Friends, girlfriends, and even family have distanced themselves. My self-worth is at an all time low right now. I didn't think about it when I was drinking.