This thread has helped me so much. Right now I am protecting DD6 from separated AH. The pain I have felt during this separation and now divorce is immense but this thread makes me realize it is all worth it to keep her in a healthy environment.
I hate the most that separated AH is so selfish and only wants to be a dad when it is convenient for him. He misses her when he misses her. He cares about his selfish need to soothe and self-medicate than what she emotionally needs.
It is so hard to see our children endure this. But we did not choose this, cannot control or cure this. All we can do is be so reliable and present for them!