When I was home last, my a sisters and brother had to get together and plan for my moms moved into assisted living after a bad stroke. I hadn't really done the 4 of us thing since my Dad died over 15 years prior. Anyway, my older brother is an addict and....subjected me to some pretty vicious torture when I was younger. I was rationale in my responses, I was pretty level headed. He kept talking over me, bullying me by shouting....he kept saying the same thing over and over again. Fighting every suggestion I brought up. I lost it, almost killed him. I was shouting uncontrollably, saying the same thing over and over, blinded by anger......I caught myself unraveling, grabbed my things and walked out. I called my wife and told her about the situation. Explained how my brother talked over me, argued his point relentlessly with me, "fixated" on 1 thing and wouldn't let it go or listen to what people were saying.....silence on the phone and then my wife's says, are we still talking about your brother or you? That was one of my first aha moments or bottoms. I was my brother and everything I hated about him and WE were our parents and everything I hated about them. Very strange and my first thought was, omg, what am I doing to MY children?
Great topic, thanks for stimulating my mind to recall it.
OGK