Hi, Stevie...
I see you that joined a short time after I did, but you haven't posted a lot. So I'm glad that you've posted, and I hope that you stick around for a while
Just looking for advice - I know I did the right thing but feel like crap. His paranoia and irrationality make it extremely difficult to have a relationship with him and even though we have been through hell multiple times - he just can't or won't respect me or my boundaries.
I think the key point is one you've made; your son is not capable of respecting your boundaries. And even if that type of person isn't an addict, we can't afford to have people like that in our lives.
As far as his father enabling him, that's his problem. Not yours.
If you hang out here long enough, you will come across others like you who have addict children. And my hope is when you cross their path and have the opportunity to absorb their ES&H, you do so. You can live a good life even if your son continues to abuse himself. If he wants to do that, that's his choice. But there's no way you should pay the price for his decisions.
Welcome back.